Safety in Obscurity

***I wrote this post over a year ago but I never published it. I was hurt and angry about my first one-star rating. I’m sharing it now to see what you think and how you feel about the criticism and rejection all writers face.***

I got my first one-star rating today. The dreaded one star. The rating that every author knows will eventually happen, but crushes all the same.

To my surprise, I didn’t shed a tear. But I immediately lost my appetite and started doubting myself and my writing. I’m a failure. I never should’ve published this book. I should’ve rewritten it again. I shouldn’t even be trying. And I remembered my writer friend texting me awhile back when she received her first one-star rating. She wasn’t just hurt but angry. She wanted to know why this reader rated it so low. She wanted a review, some idea. But there was nothing. I think it’s sad and mean when readers who don’t like a book for whatever reason just hit the one star and keep on going. We all dislike books we read for one reason or another. But when I do, I simply go on to the next book. I don’t wreck that author’s day or make them question their worth as a writer with a terrible rating or a negative review.

Maybe it’s better in my case that there weren’t harsh words to accompany that low rating. Doesn’t one star say it all anyway? Do I want to read about how my characters or story was dumb or how that reviewer hates my writing or thinks I’m mediocre? Definitely not. Nothing will come from mean negativity except doubt and pain. And I’d love to face these reviewers and ask them how their books are going? How many stars and positive reviews did your book receive? Because the truth is, people who leave low ratings and negative reviews are ultimately unhappy and angry people and want nothing more than to drag other people down with them. I learned that a long time ago, and when I became an indie author, I knew this would happen. When I put my work out there for anyone and everyone to read, I knew not everyone would like it, some would hate it and a group would feel the need to let me know how much they hated it. I knew all of that, but I published and did a book promotion anyway. And after a couple thousand downloads, the ratings started. And today, the first one-star.

So I sit here and wonder if it’s better to stay safe in obscurity. Is it better to publish my books quietly as I’ve been doing, allowing friends and family to read and review and doing minimal promotion? That’s what I was doing for a long time, and I was happy with my four and five star ratings and my few positive reviews. But as a writer, I wanted more. I wanted my stories to reach more people. I wanted to entertain. That’s the reason most writers write. This isn’t private journal writing. I want to be a part of the big wonderful book world. I just want a small place. I was tired of the obscurity, and I reached out for more.

I ran a free book promotion on my latest book, a Halloween story that’s sweet and fun. I have no illusions that my story is a masterpiece, and I don’t think it’ll ever be a bestseller. It’s just a story I enjoyed writing and I wanted others to enjoy reading. So I thought it was appropriate to run a promotion in October for my Halloween-themed story. And I was amazed by the number of downloads. Were that many people interested in my book? Was it because of the Halloween theme? Or was it the fact that it was free?

I’ve been told that there are a lot of readers who snap up anything that’s free and when they read it and are disappointed, they feel a need to tell the world. I’ve downloaded dozens of free books, and I’ve enjoyed some and been disappointed with others. But I move on. I do not give a low rating to these books. I wouldn’t do that to an author who has given so much of their heart and time to their creations. I do leave reviews when I like a book and I think others should read it. I am an author who wants to help my fellow authors. Support and encouragement.

This world is brutal, and I wish people would understand that a little kindness goes a long way, even if that kindness is simply to leave no rating at all.

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